I absolutely can’t put off any longer the complete revamp of the poor old Team Courage site. It has been neglected since October. I left the Powder Puff race to rush back to Colorado for my implant swap surgery. As you probably know,the surgery didn’t go so well. I battled with my surgeons,battled with depression,and had to have surgery again,and just didn’t have it in me to update that site. It made me sad to even think about Team Courage because I wasn’t sure when I would be able to focus on it again. So I just kind of ignored it.

Well,I can’t ignore it any longer because I feel better and I’m right here with my truck! She is just calling to me everyday! So,although time grows very short,I’m trying to get the truck ready to take part in the Mexican 1000 in May. I won’t be able to drive,partially because of my responsibilities with NORRA but also because I’m not allowed to go off road until I’m fully healed from my last surgery. That will probably be in June. But I would still love to be able to have my truck be a part of the event.

I moved the truck last weekend to start the prep process. I have started contacting potential sponsors and organizations to see if there is any help out there for our Team. I have some really big news about that,but want to release it on the Team Courage site.

I took some time to make 2 videos for Team Courage. I have found that it’s hard for busy people to read a package and really understand what we’re all about. So I made these two videos and they have been extremely effective. I hope you are able to take the time to watch them. I can finally watch the second one without getting misty eyed. And yes,I was NOT supposed to be doing what I was doing in that video. That’s why I did it all by myself! But I paid for it later. I’m fine,but I was really worried I pulled some stitches again for a few days.

Oh,the beginings are almost the same,but they are 2 different videos.

I am now almost 13 months from my bilateral mastectomy. 4 months from my first implant swap with silicone implants. 3 1/2 months from damaging my surgery site and the falling of my left implant. 7 weeks from my second implants swap and horribly painful muscle repair. And for the first time since I found the lump in my breast I feel like I’m moving forward with my life.

No more constant reminders of my freakish body every time I move and feel the expanders under my skin. No more sadness or the gut wrenching feeling when seeing my scarred body with hard plastic deformed balls that look glued to my chest. No more trips to the doctor to have my expanders filled,causing tightness and pain for days. No more wondering when my next surgery will be,or what I will look like when this is all over. No more fear of my implant falling further down my abdomen.

I no longer feel like a freak 24 hours a day. Continue reading →